Friday, February 21, 2014



The following article contains the Prologue and Chapter 1 from my new novella "Power In The Blood".  Now available at Amazon.com.

If you wish to purchase a copy, please check the Amazon Kindle Link shown at the end of this article.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


PROLOGUE

As Heather sauntered past his table, Martin Sullivan allowed himself a moment to enjoy the scrumptious nature of the young woman's figure. Her body was slender and very shapely, having a delightful muscle tone that came from working out three times a week. On this particular evening, Heather's legs were adorned by stockings that were very sheer and had a shading that was commonly referred to as "Barely Black". This gave Martin's favorite casino hostess a look that was decidedly different from the jet black ballerina tights being worn by every other hostess in the establishment.

As far as company management was concerned, there was nothing improper about a hostess choosing to wear sheer hosiery. Most of the girls preferred to wear heavy tights because there was much less chance of them having a serious snag or run after only one evening of use. In Heather's case, a minor bending of the normal procedure was her way of informing Martin that she was in the mood for having sex with him this evening. When her hosiery was off black and very sheer, it always meant that the stockings were thigh tops and that she wasn't wearing panties beneath her skirt.

Martin would have another three and a half hours to ponder the knowledge that his lady friend was wearing absolutely nothing under her hostess uniform. Her five hour shift on the floor would end thirty minutes before his eight hours of dealing black jack. The girl would be waiting for him at his place this evening when he arrived with a pizza and a six pack of soft drinks. Not the most romantic of dinners but each of them planned on eating just enough to prevent hunger from getting in the way of screwing each other's brains out.

At the immediate moment, the only thing distracting Martin's brain from thinking only about Heather was the fact that he was back at the same table with his least favorite player. In his fourteen years of dealing Black Jack, Martin Sullivan had never seen anyone have as much obscenely good luck as Arthur Trice. This was the man's fifteenth or sixteenth Monday evening of walking into the Swan Casino with only one hundred dollars in cash and walking away with more than three thousand. Trice clearly wasn't counting cards, Martin was absolutely certain of that. He'd helped catch his share of cheaters over the years and all of them invariable had a handful of odd little traits that started giving them away within an hour or two.

"Have you ever noticed that no one drinks at his table?" The previous Monday's Pit Boss had asked Martin, just after Trice had left the casino.

"People at his table had drinks this evening," Martin replied.

"There were people who had drinks in front of them but no one was downing what was in their cup," The Boss countered. "As soon as our friend Mr. Trice put himself at that table, anyone who had anything alcoholic immediately stopped drinking it. And people who are even the least bit inebriated tend to avoid sitting at a table once he's there. Joe and Jane Lush may be going over to check out what's happening but they'll always turn and go somewhere else."

"He must radiate a special kind if Karma," Martin joked, a touch of exasperation in his voice.

"Not quite certain what the little twerp is radiating!" The Boss had said. But if I ever catch his smarmy ass cheating, I'm gonna make sure that all ten of his greedy little fingers get broken."

Martin was pretty sure this particular Pit Boss was merely venting his anger at being taken for a sizable loss on four different occasions. Trice was just plain lucky. "Luck coming out the ears" as Martin's grandmother had been fond of saying. Whenever Trice sat down at a Black Jack table, the winning percentages of every single person at that particular station seemed to improve by well over two hundred percent.

In theory, the odds for Black Jack should be weighted towards the players. Having absolutely no discretion in what he was doing as he gamed against the people who were seated around his table, the Dealer had to keep drawing cards for himself until his point total had reached or exceeded the number seventeen. That would leave someone like Martin with only a four point safety margin. At twenty two points or higher; the Dealer would be busted and any player who hadn't already gone over twenty one would automatically win, no matter how low his or her point total might be.

In the real world, the problem for the players was that they had absolutely no control over who might be sitting at the table with them. Any Sam or Sheila could plop down at an empty space, put their chips on the table and start playing a hand. Which meant that three or four conscientious individuals might be carefully watching each others card patterns and doing a good job of forcing the dealer into going over his limit. Then one boozer who was much too intoxicated to think anywhere near straight would plop his ass down in a chair and quickly begin to ruin the game for everyone else.

Now that the Dealer rotation had put him back at the same table with Trice for an hour, Martin began to take account of the fact that none of the players would drink anything with alcohol in it. Even more unusual was the fact that though three people walked away and four new ones came in, the group continually played in a way that maximized the profits of Arthur Trice. Each individual generally played to win but there would be odd moments when a man or woman would refuse to take a card, even though their hand really needed the extra point value. In each instance of a person skipping his or her logical deal, Trice was provided a much better chance of drawing a good card or Martin was handed an increased probability of going over his limit.

I'm going to be keeping a very close eye on you from now on, Mister Trice. Martin thought to himself, as he looked directly at the tall slender man seated on the number four chair.

You'll have to turn your back at some point, my friend! Martin could hear in his mind as Trice looked up from his cards and grinned directly at him.

Martin Sullivan was cited for negligence that evening after suddenly walking away from his table and leaving the casino without signaling the pit boss first. Fifteen hours later, his mutilated body was discovered in a restaurant dumpster three blocks away.



CHAPTER 01
- Vixen -

"We appear to be dealing with a loon who thinks he's a Vampire," I'd said to the other eleven members of my task force on the second Thursday of September.

Only five of these officers were individuals I was actually used to working with. The person in my position will generally have three or four days to compile a team. I'd been forced to cobble this one together in less than twenty-four hours. I'd also had to miss my Wednesday evening manicure and pedicure appointment and was not at all happy that Carlos wouldn't be able to squeeze me in till this coming Tuesday at the earliest. The fingernails, I could do a better than average job of touching up on my own but I don't trust my little piggies to anyone other than Carlos Emmanuel.

"During the past eight weeks, our suspect has killed at least eleven people in the greater Chicago area." I continued." Four in Chicago proper and another seven in the surrounding communities. All eleven had severe mutilation marks on their necks and all had been drained of more than two thirds of their blood."

"Lieutenant Van Dyne!" One of the new guys shouted out as his hand shot up into the air above his head. From the corner of my eye, I could see Tom Grayson smirking and wincing at the same time.

"Not meaning to sound picky," I said to him with a soft smile. "But the title is Chief Investigator. In spite of the silver bar you see on my name tag; I'm a contract employee for the department, not a career Police Officer."

"Chief Investigator," He corrected himself, with a slight smile of his own. "Has there been any particular pattern to the lifestyles of the victims?"

"Not that we can tell at this time," I answered. "Three girls and one guy were most likely street hustlers. After that we have an Atlanta businessman, an Episcopal Priest, and a woman from Seattle who was here for a job interview with Sunrise International Bank. One guy was in town for a horror movie festival and a fairly curvy blond had an ongoing gig as eye candy at numerous trade shows and some of the more heavily promoted professional wrestling events. The most recent victim was a Black Jack dealer at the casino in Lexington."

"Has there been a blood draining pattern in any other major city?" Lieutenant Grayson inquired.

"Montreal had a rash of similar killings about six years ago," I replied. "London and Edinburgh seemed to face the same sort of thing about four and six years before that."

"So we're dealing with a guy who's jumped from Britain to Canada and then here." He commented.

"Not necessarily," I responded. "Correlation does not always equal causality."

"Would you mind saying that in everyday English?" He joked and I had to wait for the chuckling to die down.

"I'll try to keep it to words of two syllables or less just for you Tom," I countered, "This might not be the same guy or gal. We're waiting to hear more from Scotland Yard and the RCMP."

My relationship with Tom Grayson would be best described as "complicated". Two individuals who help each other get the job done but have little desire to be friends in even the slightest degree. The friction started with me getting recruited by the department to be their newest Project Coordinator when Grayson thought the job should have been his because he had seventeen years on the force and was good at creating resource flow charts and writing incident reports. The man knows that I didn't actually apply for the position, that the department came looking for me and this prevents him from actually hating me in any way. But there's been this massive wall of tension standing between the two of us during the past three and a half years and we've barely been able to do more than sand off the rough edges.

Tom and I do interact well professionally and we look just a bit too good standing next to each other. Which causes a few well meaning but completely clueless individuals to believe that we should pair off and produce absolutely adorable babies. A significant minority of the busybodies in the Chicagoland media seem to have this strange desire to see Tom and me produce a batch of perfect little cubs and then allow all of them to draw lots for who gets the pick of the litter. And the more determined these well meaning pea brains are to shove the two of us together, the more conviction Grayson and I seem to have about putting the maximum possible amount of distance between his body and mine. Almost impossible when that guy and this girl are the yin and yang of what makes this unit function. I have a natural talent for recognizing complex patterns that most people would overlook while Tom understands department protocol and procedure twice as well as anyone else I've met. I swear the man could probably do a better job of filling out paperwork in his sleep than over half the department manages to accomplish while awake.

If it were just a matter of looks, I'd be all over Tom Grayson before either of us could even blink. The man's in his early forties and his body fills out a three piece suit just a little too well. He's got that "Professional Boxer With A College Degree" look going for him. Ruggedly handsome and just a little too aware of that fact.

Which leads to Tom's major failing as a potential relationship partner. There's a certain style of woman that Grayson is consistently drawn to and most of their ilk seem too much like the type of call girl I tried to pass myself off as the couple of times I was helping with a sting operation in the warehouse district. Tom has an almost fatal weakness for females who look much too good in a mini skirt on a bar stool. The ones who are always a little too eager to have a few drinks with an off duty cop or firefighter. My friend Claire jokingly calls them "Adoration Vampires". I once asked her what she meant by the term and she explained that certain individuals get an emotional boost from hanging out with important people and receiving attention from them. Made a bit of sense after I'd thought about it for a few minutes.
Strike three for Tom and me is that Project Coordinators have traditionally been the rank of Detective Lieutenant or higher but I snuck in the back door as an Investigator. Until I signed on as the P.C.O. for the newly created Seventh District, the metro government had always used the title of Investigator as a way to temporarily bring in an outside expert or two and give them police authority for a short term period of about thirty to ninety days. Like the time they deputized a dozen accountants to allow them to help with a massive insurance fraud examination. But there's nothing in the regs that say an Investigator appointment can't be long term so they offered me a one year contract with the possibility of a three year extension. Then they invented the title of Chief Investigator and engraved a Lieutenant's bar on my name tag so Detective Sergeants would know that I didn't have to put up with any of the crap they might be tempted to toss in my direction.

In his own strange way, Grayson did me a favor on the job and title situation. Before Tom started raising seven different kinds of ruckus, the powers that be were planning on waving the shooting exam requirement and simply allowing me to serve as a desk officer. Like I said, the man knows department regulations forward, backward and sideways and he quoted the higher ups chapter and verse and made them issue a statement that I would have to pass the firearms test or the job offer would be withdrawn. Having my weapons proficiency  certification makes it a lot harder for anyone to say that I got this job because strings were pulled. The few individuals who still try to make that complaint also tend to be the types who aren't allowed within half a mile of any hotel that's hosting an X-Files Convention.

The Northern Illinois Certification Office field tested fifty-seven other people on the Saturday afternoon when I showed up to prove my stuff. Of the forty-three who passed the shooting exam, I scored in at sixth place. There's something to be said about being raised by an uncle who enjoyed putting meat on the table the old-fashioned way.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I sincerely hope you have enjoyed the sneak peak.  To order a copy from Amazon ...  Click on the following link.


Or go to the Amazon site for your country and search for ...
Travis Clemmons / Power In The Blood

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

The best Girlfriend I've Never Had




In the Summer of 2000, I'd recently been drug through a divorce.

While I wasn't the one who'd pushed the issue and filed the papers ... I also wasn't the one who'd spent the previous four years being loving and attentive and devoted while the other half of the partnership had been stuck in a downward spiral.

And just as I was beginning the process of leaving that soul sucking job and taking other measures to turn my life around ... Cally had come to the conclusion that I'd never be able to turn things around. And so she left.

Eighteen months later, just as I was getting my life back to something resembling normal, my mother unexpectedly died. Which meant that I found myself going right into another several months of emotional confusion.

In the middle of all of this, I'd wound up establishing an odd friendship with a Dancer by the name of Sondra Saxon. She was working at the Deja Vu in Lexington Kentucky. And unlike most of the other girls, she quickly saw that a part of me was broken and she took the time to become a small part of the fix.  By taking the time to actually be my friend.

Sondra could see that what I most needed was to simply sit at my table and watch the stage. Just get lost in what was taking place up there.

She'd come by my table. I'd buy her a drink. And we'd sit there and talk about the dancers for a few minutes.

What each girl was doing right and wrong.

What changes we'd like to see a girl make to her outfit.

And she made sure to spread the word to all the other Dancers that they weren't supposed to hustle me. If they did ... They'd wind up having a problem with her.

Just go to his table.

If he finds you interesting, he'll offer to buy you a drink.

Spend a few minutes talking with him about the girl on stage. And if he really wants a Table Dance or a Couch Dance ... He'll ask you for it.

And if he doesn't ask for a dance ... Just finish your drink and give him a hug and then move on.

Between 2000 and 2003 ... Sondra clearly understood that I had a bit of money ... And that I desperately needed a shoulder to lean on ... And it would have been very easy for some pretty little Vixen to sink her claws into me and drain away a lot of cash.

And she never allowed that to happen.

Sondra and I wound up becoming friends on My Space and Facebook.

We talked about a lot of the things that were going on in my life and her life.

And she often joked with me that I was the best boyfriend she'd never had.

After I'd met and married K ... She and Sondra would occasionally conspire against me. And Sondra once confided in K that there had been at least a half dozen times when she was about 2 molecules away from asking me out. But she always talked herself out of it because she didn't want to do anything that might possibly screw up the friendship she had with me.

That was what she most wanted from me.

That was what she was best able to give back.

So I dedicate this article to anyone who has ever had the privilege of knowing Sondra Saxon / Lisa Lowry.

The Absolute Best Girlfriend I Have Never Had.

Travis Clemmons

Thursday, January 23, 2014

How I Do An Interview




Let me start off by saying that I hate reading articles which claim to be interviews but are actually little more than Puff Pieces.

So ... If you allow me to interview you ... You should probably expect that a solid handful of my questions will come at you from an odd direction. Because I think that an interview should be about so much more than simply telling the world your astrological sign and favorite color.

On the other hand ... I get really pissed at Reporters and Bloggers who seem to think it is their "Sacred Duty" to mug the other person with a bunch of "Gotcha Questions". This type of behavior adds up to being nothing more than a "Bully With A Poison Pen". I don't like this type of journalism and I refuse to get anywhere near it.

So here are the small favors I'm going to ask of the people I interview. And what I'm offering to provide in return.


I: A Short Phone Call - - - Occasionally

There are those times when I just can't get any sort of handle on an individual from the info that's already out there. And not knowing the basics about someone makes it very difficult to write good questions. If this is the case, I may want to chat on the phone with you for about 15 minutes or so. This can be very important if we've never met face to face (or have met only briefly).



II: An On Line Chat - - - About 2.0 to 2.5 hours

My part time job provides me with extra spending money and allows me to be somewhat adaptable to the Time Twisting" nature of your career. So a chat could generally be at just about any time of the day. I've connected with some people at 9:00 in the morning and others after 10:00 at night.

All I ask is that you make a chat date and then do your best to keep it. While each of us has a somewhat flexible schedule ... Neither of us can simply pull a 2.5 hour block of free time out of thin air.

If I have to postpone our chat date ... I will do so as soon as the need becomes obvious. Please do the same favor for me.

Chat Dates can take place on ...

AOL Messenger (AIM)

Facebook

Google Messenger

Yahoo Messenger



III: This Needs To Be Spontaneous

There is about Zero Percent spontaneity if I simply send someone a list of questions and then they look them over and get back with me in 3 or 4 days. That is how so many of the "Puff Pieces" get put together and shoved out into the world.

I usually start off with a pre-composed list of about 15 to 20 question. And then I think of (and add in) additional questions as we go along. Those added questions can really pump the article up a notch or two. But they usually won't get asked if I simply mail someone a list and they mail me back their answers.



IV: You Have The Right To Refuse To Answer Questions On Touchy Subjects

Every individual has that sore spot or two. And a subject that one individual considers totally fine will be something that a different person will run from.

If a question causes you to cringe ... Just tell me that you need to refuse to answer that one and I'll politely move on.



V: You Deserve The Chance To Make Small Corrections.

Like I previously said ... I refuse to play gotcha.

I will take the contents of our on line chat and I will condense it down to what I consider to be a solid interview. Then you get the opportunity to spend a day or two looking the thing over and advising me of spots where you feel that you and I might have misunderstood each other.

Just keep in mind that I do mean "Small Corrections".

There was a time in the past when one individual tried to totally rewrite the thing. And I then had to refuse to publish the article because it was no longer "Our Interview". The "Rewrite" that this person had handed back to me was nothing more than a Publicity Piece.

So this is how I do an interview. And as you go through my Blog ... You will find several that have received a large number of reads and a solid degree of praise.


Among these are ...


Author - Michael Z. Williamson (Freehold Series)



Author - Raymond Benson (Six James Bond Novels)



Featured Dancer - Phoenix Phires



Pole Dance Performer & Instructor - Valerie Mae



And the list continues to grow.


Travis Clemmons



Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Pole Dancer Interview: Valerie mae




 Freeze Clemmons!

I'm Special Agent Natasha Romanoff of S.H.I.E.L.D.

Are we going to conduct this interrogation in a civilized manner?

Or do I have to ZAP you with my Phone LASER?







Travis:
At dance competitions, you bill yourself as Mariah. What are the origins of that moniker?

Vãlërîë Mãë
That was my dancer name when I first started so I kept it. Everyone used to say I looked like Mariah Carey.

Travis:
Is there any kind of strong line of distinction between the Valerie and Mariah?

Vãlërîë Mãë
Mariah is like my alter ego. I can do whatever as Mariah. I'm like superwoman. Valerie is my "professional" self.

Travis:
And is Valerie a bit more shy or reserved?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I wouldn't say shy. But reserved yes. More like careful.

Travis:
How did you get into Pole Fitness and Pole Dancing?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I started stripping when I was 18 years old and it just wasn't my thing. I found miss pole and it was meant to be. 

Travis:
And how does the family feel about you being a Pole Instructor and Performer?

Vãlërîë Mãë
My mom is my biggest fan. She was at the Stripperpalooza when I placed first and she cried. She tells everyone about it. I'm very Grateful and fortunate.

Travis:
Based on your comment about stripping ... Should I take it that you wouldn't want to do the type of Stage Work that Ladies like Vayda Kiss, Artemis Moon and Phoenix Phires are doing?
 
Vãlërîë Mãë
I think that they're features . Which in my mind, is like an ultimate stripper. The cream of the crop. If I had the charisma that those ladies have on stage, hell yeah I'd do more stage but I'm a poler. That's what makes me happy.

Travis:
Makes sense.

So let's move on to the basic "Girl Watcher" questions.

How tall are you?

Vãlërîë Mãë
5' 4" in my bare feet. 6'0" to 6'1" in my heels.

Travis:
And if I were going to buy a pair of high heels for you ... What should I be looking for?

Vãlërîë Mãë
Black 8" to 9" Pleasers.

Travis:
Pleasers?

Vãlërîë Mãë
Yeah.

Pleasers: The typical eye catching stiletto every woman should have in her closet ;-)

Travis:
Gotcha ... As in "Pleasing the one you're with"

Vãlërîë Mãë
Exactlyyyyy

There's a brand or two that uses some variation of that name. And some girls just refer to any shoe of that style as a "Pleaser".

Travis:
In defining the types of shoes that would qualify as "Pleasers" ...

Pumps?
Boots?
Some spike heeled sandals?
Or does more than one of these styles qualify for that definition?

Vãlërîë Mãë
Pleasers can be all types of styles and colors. Some of the boots are pretty wicked.

Travis:
And in that 8" to 9" of high heel ... How much would usually be caused by the platform?

Vãlërîë Mãë
In an 8" to 9" heel, roughly 4" would be the platform and the rest would be the way the shoe turns my ankle.

Travis:
And are you more of a bare leg kind of gal? Or do you feel that the right hosiery can really help an outfit on certain occasions?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I do like stockings on some women in certain settings. However, I need my skin to stick to the pole so it's not realistic for me to wear them while performing.

Travis:
Completely Understood.

Several girls have told me that (from a style standpoint) one of the disadvantages of pole performing is that you can't do as much dressing up on stage. That you basically have to do the booty shorts and the bikini top and maybe some high heels.

How do you work your outfits around that ... To get the maximum "Oh Yeah" factor from the audience?
 


Vãlërîë Mãë
I have been accessorizing my outfits since I started dancing. I love ankle cuffs ... Really like my ankles and feel naked it I don't have something on them. Hair and makeup are also super important In my mind as well. It's puts the whole package together.

Travis:
One of the first things my wife and I noticed about you was those ankle cuffs. How did those make their way into your costume wardrobe?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I used to wear leg warmers religiously. They were just too bulky so I started playing with new ideas and whaaaalaaa! Mariah's ankle cuffs were born!! Lol

Travis:
At the Science Fiction and FantasyConventions ... I met a lovely girl who was the manager and stage babe for an alternative rock band. At the Cons ... She was always wearing fairly large and ornate angels wings. When someone asked her about them in an interview ... She said "I honestly feel naked if I'm in public and I don't have them on"

Vãlërîë Mãë
Yes! Exactly. I feel like I'm missing a part of me if I don't have my ankle cuffs on.

Travis:
And from a personal vs dancing standpoint ... How do you go about picking things like undies and lingerie?

Vãlërîë Mãë
Personally I love Victoria's Secret! (What woman doesn't?)

For dancing I am always in black booty shorts. Nothing fancy.

Travis:
And if I were going dress shopping ... What are your measurements?

Vãlërîë Mãë
32 - 26 - 36

Travis:
Eye Color?

Vãlërîë Mãë
Brown.

Travis:
If I asked you to be ready for a casual dinner (pizza / burgers / wings / or whatever) and a movie. What style should I expect to see when you open your front door and say hello?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I'm a jeans and hoodie type if girl. I do like to get dressed up once and awhile for a nice night.

Travis:
And if we were doing that dress up date ... Fancy dinner and then a cabaret show or maybe a cocktail party?

Vãlërîë Mãë
A black dress and heels. Curly hair and very red lips.

Travis:
Ever do the false eyelash thing?

Vãlërîë Mãë
Yes.

I love long false lashes but they're bad for your natural lashes so I usually try to avoid them.

Travis:
So ... Maybe for a really fancy event but mostly stay away from them?

Vãlërîë Mãë
Yes.

Sometimes I throw them on when I want to feel elegant.

Travis:
Trust me ... You have a touch of natural elegance My wife and I agree on that.

Vãlërîë Mãë
Thank you.

Travis:
As best I've been able to determine ... I'm about 3/8 Cherokee. The rest is Welsh, English and French.

Could you tell me a bit about your background?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I'm mostly Norwegian and German. And I'm about 1/4 Cree.

Travis:
Back in September, when I first met you, your skin appeared largely virgin and untouched. Since then, one of your arms appears to have had a very torrid love affair with a tattoo needle. What has brought all of that about?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I've always been in love with the art of tattoo. I'd already had my lower back and thigh done when we last saw each other.

I've always wanted a sleeve and finally had the time to do one on my right arm.

Travis:
Do you plan on having illustrations done on any other body areas? The legs? Maybe a bit more on the back?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I do.

I plan on adding into my original pieces.

Travis:
And how is the Cree part of your heritage involved in the pictures and patterns you are having done?

Vãlërîë Mãë
It's the main focal point.

I love that I come from a Native American background and I love the art. It was only right to add it to my temple.
 


Travis:
And how do you define your body as "your temple"?

Vãlërîë Mãë
My body is a temple in that I was given this body and I plan on protecting it. I eat clean and exercise to help maintain my lifestyle. I choose to decorate my temple with my heritage, ideas and dreams.

Travis:
And do you plan in doing all tattoos in black and flesh tone? Or will a bit of color sneak in here or there?

Vãlërîë Mãë
Black and white. I don't plan on adding any color

Travis:
And if we were dating ... And I offered to pay for a special tattoo somewhere (as something like a birthday present) ... About how big would it be and about how much would it cost me?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I love big pieces. Seeing as I'm almost done with my right sleeve, I'd start adding onto some other part. It's $100/hr and I usually sit for around 3hours. So roughly $300.

Travis:
So ... You'd be a "moderately expensive" sugar baby?

Vãlërîë Mãë
Haha yes!

There is a lot of money pumped Into my skin.

( And even though we're not dating, my birthday is in two months and the other arm is feeling a bit naked - wink wink)

LOL

Travis:
(chuckle)
Have you been conferring with Phoenix Phires?

Cause she throws that "even though we're not dating" bit of teasing at me from time to time ;-)

Vãlërîë Mãë
No LOL. We don't talk at all. Just coincidence.

( wink wink )

Travis:
(snickering)

If "0" equals Total Tom Boy and "100" equals Total Sugar Baby ... Where do you think Valerie is on the number line?

And does your place on that line ever rise or lower ... Depending on the occasion or your mood? 


Vãlërîë Mãë
I'd say valerie stays around 25. The girl loves guns and cars. But she isn't afraid to get pretty once and awhile.

Mariah is at least an 85. A complete girly girl who's in love with makeup and rainbows and maybe a unicorn or two.

Travis:
A lot of dancers, who are tattooed, have also had cosmetic surgery. Have you considered that in any way?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I had debated getting implants, but I was given this body and I have realized I'm happy with what I have.

Travis:
At the Dance Classes and the Stage Competitions ... There's a lot of silly innocent flirting going on between many of the dancers. Mainly as a way of building friendships and working off stress.

Then there also appears to be to be a solid minority of them who would welcome something a bit more intimate with another girl if the opportunity presented itself.

How do you navigate through all of this?

Vãlërîë Mãë
I've never been hit on! I'd probably be like WTF!

LOL

I love being a woman because we can get away with the meaningless girly flirting. I truly believe it's pretty much all in fun.
 
Travis:
You're in your early 20s.

Have you taken any college courses? Or was it pretty much a case of leaving high school and going straight into the working world?


Vãlërîë Mãë
I began working my senior year in high school. I hope once my life slows down some to go back to school.

Travis:
And where would you hope to be business wise in like 10 years? 20? 30?

Vãlërîë Mãë
In 10 years I should have my own pole studio, graduated from collage, and no kids.

20 years I should have 10+ studios all over USA.

And in 30 years, I hope to be retired and living somewhere warm and still hopefully able to pole.

Travis:
Any additional thoughts on where you'd like the personal part of your life to head?

Vãlërîë Mãë
No. That about sums it up.

Travis:
What advice would you give to a young woman who was asking about trying something like Pole Dancing as a profession? (Either teaching or Performing)

Vãlërîë Mãë
I would urge them to take a pole dance class or two. It is crucial to the safety of the dancer.

Travis:
And is physical conditioning a bit more important than many people initially believe?

Vãlërîë Mãë
It's important to learn but you don't have to be like that when you start.

At Miss Pole we start everyone at the beginning. Where to place your hands and feet. How to correctly execute a spin.

Then we build the strength needed to progress further.

But there's no major physical conditioning prerequisite before you begin learning how to pole. Just that you learn how to properly do the moves and care for your body.

Travis:
Okay ... Anything else you'd like to tell the readers? Any points I might have missed that you'd like to touch on?

Do you possibly want to promote an upcoming event or the studio you work at? 

Vãlërîë Mãë
Besides being a competitive Pole Dancer ...

I'm the Office Manager at Miss Pole in Brookfield Wisconsin

We have been open more than 6 years

We also have locations in Madison and Kenosha

You can find us on line at ... www.misspole.com

Travis:
Thank you for sharing this time with me.

Vãlërîë Mãë
You are very welcome. 


Sunday, December 15, 2013

The Gingerbread Clan

These statues were on display in Naperville Illinois during the Holiday Season.  My Lovely Evil Wife and I caught sight of them while shopping in the downtown on Black Friday.


Abby  -  Artist: Marianne Lisson Kuhn  -  Sponsor: Main Street Promenade


Ginger Brush Man
Artists: Naperville North Art Club  -  Sponsor: Naperville Dental Specialties


Home For The Holidays  -  Sponsor:  Baird & Warner


I Rest My Case  -  Artist: Cherie Matousek  -  Sponsor: Greenberg Law Firm


Equinox  -  Artist: Laura Cavanaugh  -  Sponsor: Riverwalk Family Dental


Gingerbread George
Artist: Angela Graefenhain  -  Sponsor: Downtown Naperville Alliance


 
Sunny Boy  -  Artist: Molly Miklosz  -  Sponsor: Naperville Sun


D Mi  -  Artist: Matt Hebel  -  Sponsor: DMI Hotels


Chuck  -  Artist: Angela Keating  -  Sponsor: Charles Schwab


Travis Clemmons







Tuesday, December 10, 2013

Belmont Burlesque - The Naughty List






Carol of the Boobs
MsPixy, Lady Annabelle, Naughty Natanya, Bella Ciao
Hazel Hellbender, Diva LaVida, Slightly Spitfire & Pup T'Nogood
 
The people of Belmont Burlesque have provided me with good cause to find the answers to the following holiday entertainment questions.

- 1 -
What happens when you have two modest and self respecting Sugar Plum Fairies … Forced to deal with a little sister who can't seem to understand that “There are some things about us we really don't want the Human's to see”?

Sugar Plums
Naughty Natanya, Bella Ciao & Hazel Hellbender

- 2 -
Did the wayward Angel actually fall from grace? Or did she enjoy every single moment of casually strolling down the mountainside?

Bad Angel as performed by Bella Ciao

- 3 -
What happens when a good looking gentleman is politely trying to ask his Mis-Match.Com date to leave … And she's had just enough to drink, that no matter what the poor fellow says, she hears a sexual come on?

Baby It’s Cold Outside
Pup T'Nogood & Bambi Rein

- 4 -
What is it going to cost me to have Bazuka Joe perform at my Lovely Evil Wife's Birthday Party this Summer?


Drummer Boy as performed by Bazuka Joe

- 5 -
And most important of all …

How good of a review should a smart ass Irish Comedian expect when he's decided to make fun of the nation of Wales … Not realizing that the invited Drama Critic has a grandfather by the last name of Edwards?

Featured Comedian - Adam Burke

What I love most about the people of Belmont Burlesque, is that they combine a delightfully refined sense of the absurd with a healthy respect for propriety. While very little is sacred to this group of delightful lunatics, they clearly know how to avoid the crude and tasteless forms of behavior that a lot of modern day slobs and buffoons are determined to try and pass off as comedy. They work very hard to take the high road and their shows are made that much better for it.

Having not seen Adam Burke before this show, I'm rather happy that I got the opportunity to watch the boy perform before some other angry Welshman decided to strangle him with his bare hands. Burke has a comedy style that tends to be casual and meandering. Quite different from the frantic scattergun type of routine that is too often present in 21st Century Comedy Clubs. The man is as much a Storyteller as he is a Comedian. And that is very welcome to my ears.

I hope to have the opportunity to watch Adam perform again, in the not too distant future, in spite of the fact that he's a stuck up Irish know it all. Because I'm darn certain that the two of us would be quite happy to sit down for a drink and do everything we could to bad mouth the English and the Scots. And don't even get us started on the French.


I want to hand a special shout out to Ms Pixy, who makes the task of being an M.C. Appear almost effortless. Having done that job, I can attest to the fact that it can be nerve racking.

From beginning to end … This past Weekend's show was nothing less than solid. Often rising to masterful and hilarious. There was not a bad act in the bunch. And I'm very sorry I don't have the opportunity to mention every single act and performer by title and name.

The Cast performing White Christmas

If you were unlucky enough to miss that performance, feel free to visit the Wit Theater this coming Saturday. The troupe will be giving a (mostly) repeat performance with a few of this past Saturday's acts being replaced by other routines and artists.

That's the nature of Live Theatre. It's always changing and evolving.

Travis Clemmons.

Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Stripperfest: Aspen Reign



























A good friend of mine is a professional makeup artist.

A few years ago, I saw him do a presentation where he brought twin sisters onto the stage and sat them about five feet away from each other. The girl on the left had been made up in a way that was appropriate for a photo shoot or the filming of a motion picture. The girl on the right had been prepared for appearing on stage in a theatre that would seat at least 500 people.

To the people near the front of the lecture hall, the girl on the left looked perfectly normal while the make up of the girl on the right appeared to be horribly over done.

To the people at the back of the room, the face of the girl on the left appeared to be little more than a vague blur while the girl on the right seemed incredibly attractive.

The moral of this little tale is that each young woman's makeup had been properly done. But each had been prepared for a different venue. While neither makeup job was Bad, each could easily be described as Right or Wrong ... Depending on the venue the girl was expected to perform in.





At StripperFest ... Both Aspen Reign and Artemis Moon delivered stunning performances. But it is my sincere opinion that Aspen gave a performance which was not a proper fit for the the nature of the Club or the Contest. Aspen presented what was primarily a Theatrical Performance, at a contest where the primary corner stone was dance.

Had Aspen been on stage in an auditorium which would seat at least 500 people ... Her large props, grand costumes and eye popping light show would have been a magnificent set of assets. That is the type of location where you want your routine to be larger than life.

But in a Club atmosphere ... Where the stage is modest in size and the people are so close that they can almost read the labels on the soles of your shoes ... This is where a performer needs to jettison the large props and elaborate costumes. This is where she needs to do everything she can to make the motion of her body the absolute center of everyone's attention. This is where she needs to give everyone in the front row a clear and compelling reason to believe that she knows they are there and that she adores each and everyone of them.







Aspen Reign gave a marvellous performance that weekend. But she did not give this performance.

The intimate and flirtatious performance was presented by Artemis Moon. And that is why she took the title "Queen Of The Stage".

In a different venue ... One where all the contestants were performing on a theatrical stage in front of a crowd of at least 500 people ... Aspen would quite likely have prevailed.

Travis Clemmons