My lovely evil redheaded wife is 5'9" tall. Because of this, I'm the only man she's ever dated who was taller than she was. When she mentioned this to me, I handed her a reply that earned me close to a ton of relationship bonus points.
"Isn't it obvious, darling?
Most men over six feet tall seem to
have this thing for cute little nymphs.
The guys under 5'7" are secretly looking
for a Goddess."
To celebrate the fact that her love for me has grown steadily during the past six years, I offer the following Valentines gift.
The Top 10 Clues
You've Fallen Under The Love Spell Of A Goddess.
- 10 -
You find yourself strangely compelled to write page after page of intricately crafted love poetry.
In ancient Greek.
In ancient Greek.
- 9 -
Her favorite sexual position is on top.
Of a cloud.
- 8 -
The gorgeous model that you couldn't stop obsessing on 6 months ago ... Now seems about as attractive as an Iguana.
Possibly because she now IS an Iguana.
- 7 -
Her e-mail address is Heavenly Body @ Mount Olympus . Com
- 6 -
Her special kisses have the delightful flavor of honey scented ambrosia. And kissing her on the mouth tastes pretty good to.
- 5 -
The Pre-Nuptual Agreement ... Is written in ancient Aramaic.
- 4 -
Her list of late husbands ... All having died of old age ... is only three names shorter than the Green Bay Wisconsin phone directory.
- 3 -
She asks you ...
"Honey, If daddy can't make it to the wedding ... Is it OK if I'm walked down the aisle by Uncle RA?"
- 2 -
You finally put two and two together ... And realize that her cousin Jesus is not Hispanic.
And the most important clue that you may have
fallen under the love spell of a Goddess.
- 1 -
Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic.
With Adoration For The Evil Woman Who Mercilessly Stole My Heart.